Don't know what to say, don't know what to do, but seat here quietly, enjoy this suffocating torment, for memory, for all the good things I lost that will never come back......
One hour later ------
All of a sudden, a terrible truth sparks in my mind:
In last one year and four months, I dropped out school and kept working day and night without rest, gained some kind of accomplishment out of my age, however, unconsciously, I slowly fell into a deep hole without fun, without friends, without diverse lives, but just working. I think I'd been caged in a colorless world!
Fuck!!!
I don't know what to do to get rid of this, I know I have no way to fall back, I have to believe that it's the desperate life everyone has to experience, but I do bloody hate it more than anything else!
Suddenly I feel like to have a cry...
